


A Step into the Past – A Leap into the Future

by issabella



Category: X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Canon Disabled Character, Erik Logic Is The Best Logic, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Old Mutant Husbands, Protective Erik, Time Travel Fix-It, erik decides he needs to teach himself a lesson, even old Erik still acts rashly, though more fluff really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-25
Updated: 2014-08-25
Packaged: 2018-02-14 17:01:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2199771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/issabella/pseuds/issabella
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erik, happily living with Charles, stumbles through a portal back into the past where he meets their younger versions, shortly after the events of Days of Future Past. He is determined to make his young self see the error of his ways and console young Charles, determined to grasp at a chance for a better future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Step into the Past – A Leap into the Future

**Author's Note:**

> After xmdofp some ideas and fanart was going round on tumblr about how older Erik should meet his younger self. This is my take on the idea.  
> Not betad!  
> Posted before on tumblr, though this is the edited version.

The tunnels were twisting and narrow. Erik had to duck down a couple of times to avoid hitting his head. He cursed the stab of pain that went through his back each time, reminding him that he was not that young anymore. He would regret this whole 'cave-exploration-quest' next morning, when old muscles and joints would band together in a crescendo of pain, leaving him to drag himself out of bed, moaning and groaning. The only good thing about his pained state would be Charles, who would find ample opportunity to tease him, smiling warmly at him with that twinkle in his eyes that Erik so loved to see. And then Charles would urge him to lie back down in bed and offer to rub his back, perhaps even cancel one of his classes to fuss over him, and all that would be worth the pain – almost. Erik thought himself fully capable of complaining more while feeling less pain too.

Thinking of Charles made Erik wonder how he had managed to navigate his chair – even if it was a technical masterpiece constructed in a joint effort by Hank and Erik himself – through the small space of twisting tunnels. But Charles was always so optimistic that he could probably persuade the rocks to move – optimistic and stubborn.

_'But you are glad I'm stubborn, especially when it comes to never losing faith in you.'_

Erik stopped for a moment, smiling at the familiar brush of thoughts against his mind. “You know I am. You are the best kind of stubborn.” And his optimism in the end had even moved Erik.

_'Good. Now hurry up, I think I'm getting close to the source of the strange voices I kept hearing last night.'_

Erik sighed, half relieved half disgruntled. He had thought what or whoever had kept Charles awake last night was nothing more than one of the pupils having nightmares. But Charles had insisted the source was something else, sending them on this strange quest right the next morning, instead of staying in bed and sleeping in. After all that was what Sundays were for. The rest of the week Charles got his way, getting up early to teach classes.

_'We can still retire early, claiming to be exhausted from this adventure.'_

“That's hardly the same.” Especially since these days, them being exhausted would be nothing but the sad truth.

_'I told you I don't mind you falling asleep on me.'_

Erik still cringed. He did not want to think about that. It wasn't that he felt any less enthusiasm for having sex with Charles, only it was much harder to keep that enthusiasm to get – somewhere. If only he had been less narrow-minded in his youth and heard what Charles was saying, instead of hearing what he thought he was saying.

_'Erik!'_

The urgency of the thought interrupted his brooding. 

_'I think - I have found what – oh - '_

Even before the stream of thoughts was cut off, Erik broke into a run. 

_'Charles? - Charles!'_ There was no answer, not even the gentle caress of the cherished and loved mind, only silence. In full disregard of his own body, Erik dashed off, bruising his shoulder on a jutting piece of rock, only barely ducking in time to avoid knocking himself out on the low curving ceiling. The pain in his back was forgotten as he hurried on, all that mattered was the panicked flutter in his heart, the empty echo in his mind, the pain of loss. 

He finally stumbled out into a small cave. He was winded but kept upright and going by the adrenalin coursing through his body. Ahead and facing him was a large shimmering hole. It looked like someone had managed to cut out a piece of the uneven surface of the sea, glittering in the sunlight, and had dumped it here in this cave. 

Nevertheless the mysterious object looked strangely familiar. He suddenly had to think of purple hair and bright green eyes. Yes, that was it, this thing ahead reminded him of the portals Blink was capable of creating. What if this was exactly what it was. A portal. And Charles – missing from the cave, no longer close enough for their minds to touch, well there was only one explanation where he could have gone. Without hesitation Erik rushed forward. _'Charles – I'm coming for you...'_

"Erik, no - !" Charles only caught a last glance of Erik disappearing into the shimmering void, just as he floated his chair around from behind it. His heart was hammering in his chest. Why hadn't Erik stopped to look around, to call out, to – think! Even age hadn't cured him of his rash impulsive actions.

But Charles himself should have waited where Erik could see him, he shouldn't have let curiosity get the better of him and start to investigate on his own, especially when he realised that the thing, whatever it was, was messing with his telepathy.

He stared at the shimmering surface that gave no clue as to what lay behind it.

Erik had believed he had gone through it, and had gone after him without hesitation. Charles should do the same – yet there was no guarantee this thing was really a door of some kind. It could harm whoever went into it. Charles rubbed over his forehead, digging his fingers into his temples. No, he was sure he would know if Erik was... seriously hurt, no matter the distance. 

He let his chair hover closer to the portal, refusing to think of it as anything else, not allowing his mind to dwell on the possibility that Erik might be lost to him.

Still he had no way to know that, if he were to go through it, he would end up exactly at the same place Erik did, or the same time, planet or dimension.

The sensible thing would be to stay here and wait.

He had to trust Erik to come back to him, no matter what. 

Erik always came back to him.

♣ ♣ ♣

For a moment everything was engulfed in blinding white light, then Erik stood in the dim twilight of a familiar corridor. The same corridor he had walked through just this morning. From an alien landscape filled with spaceships to an enchanted snow-covered forest (maybe with a faun lurking around the next lamppost) he had expected everything. To find himself back at the school was surprisingly anticlimactic as well as rather soothing. This meant that Charles was safe! 

He let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding and turned around, just in time to see the portal evaporate into thin air.

Erik shrugged and started forward, intent to find Charles and tell him he was back and they needed to send someone to fetch the car from the entrance of the caves, because he was going to make the best of the rest of their Sunday after the moment of worry Charles had caused him. (Actually it was a moment of sheer panic and fear of loss, but he would only admit that if there was no other way of convincing Charles to retire to their room right away.) He planned on locking them in their bedroom and refuse to let go of Charles until Monday crept around.

The school was eerily quiet, he noticed, especially for a day when there were no classes. But perhaps there had been a field-trip planned for today, that he had forgotten about. So Charles and he would have had the whole place to themselves, if they hadn't gone on this pointless quest exploring. Erik huffed. He really didn't like wasting their precious time together like this.

Suddenly he heard voices from up ahead. They were coming from Charles' study. Not so alone after all – but he smiled as he recognised Charles' voice, then stopped. There was something odd about it. The timbre of his voice was different. And his tone was, well, he sounded like Erik hadn't heard him in a long time now – pained or frustrated. Frowning, Erik snuck closer, wondering what was going on and who dared cause Charles such grieve.

"I know exactly why you are here, Erik!"

For a moment Erik thought Charles had noticed him, but then he heard someone else answer, a voice so familiar yet strange at the same time.

"Do you really know? You accuse me of abandoning you and now, that I make an effort to keep in touch, all I hear - "

"That is not the real reason. I know you talked to Hank, but he won't assist you in this."

"And there you claimed you would never get into my head ever again.” Erik sounded so smug, so self-assured. 

“I didn't need to read your mind, or Hank's, for that matter. He told me. Cause he values my opinion. Something you obviously don't care about.”

Erik snorted. “I know your opinion. You won't agree with me, you never have.”

“You're right, I never agreed with your methods, but maybe if you would listen we could find a common ground. But instead you come here, pretend you want to see me, only to go behind my back for one of your oh-so-brilliant schemes to overthrow the human government. ”

“Can't I enjoy talking to you and have a game of chess, while still keeping focused on what is truly important.”

Erik withdrew into the shadow of the closest door-frame. He remembered all this only too well. The conversation in Charles' office, how it had started and more importantly, how it had ended all those years ago – so the portal had sent him back in time. As surprising as it was, to find himself in his past, it wasn't enough to distract him from the hopeless situation Charles and his younger self were currently in. Both wanting the other by their side, yet unable to reach past their differences. 'Oh, Charles. What a fool I've been.' His heart heavy, Erik closed his eyes for a moment.

He didn't quite understand how it came to be that this portal spat him out at the place that now he called home, at a time when he was too stubborn to even consider it as such. He had been aloof and self-righteous those days, thinking mainly about the bigger cause. His single-mindedness was a shield though, to keep him from examining his feelings which, at the time, he had considered a weakness.

He had been so afraid that Charles might have second thoughts about his promise never to alter his mind and would sneak into his head. Blinded by fear and distrust he had closed his heart to what he, what both of them, wanted and needed. To be together, to find a way to work together, to love.

If only...

Charles sounded strained as he spoke next. “Thank you, Erik, for reminding me about your priorities. You want to talk, but you don't want to listen. Perhaps you would be better off with a dog! As for playing chess, I'm sure I can ask Hank to devise some sort of chess-computer to play you, at least then you won't need to worry about it sneaking into your mind, because clearly despite everything that happened, you still don't trust me.”

“Clearly it was a mistake coming here after all!”

Erik heard these hurtful words uttered in his own voice followed by the sound of footsteps. Finally the front door was slammed into its lock. Regardless of him knowing that this was how it had happened, the loud crash made him flinch.

Uncertainly, Erik stood in the corridor, until he heard Charles' thump his fist against wood. “Damn you Erik, damn you – why do you have to come back and torment me, why do you leave me, why can't you - “

'Stay?' When Erik had finally been able to admit to himself what he truly wanted, Charles had been there, welcoming him with open arms. Had he been ready to do that from the very beginning?

Without giving any possible consequences much thought, Erik walked up to the door to Charles' office and peered in. 

Charles sat in his old chair, it still had wheels, his body slumped forward. The fist resting on his desk was trembling while the expression on his face was hidden by the hair he still wore long. It couldn't be that long after the – and in hindsight Erik was able to admit – embarrassing and not too clearly thought through – stadium incident. He remembered he had visited Charles often and they had quarrelled repeatedly - every time - so Erik had stopped coming and the next time he saw Charles again, Charles had cut his hair shorter. He had liked him with the long hair; he had never told him that – until years later, when it was too late and he actually had grown very fond of Charles' bald head.

It was testimony to how rattled Charles must be by the young Erik's words, that Erik could walk right up to his old, young, not yet lover and put a tentative hand on his shoulder.

Charles looked up, one moment hope shining in his eyes, before he startled at the unfamiliar sight of an older man with white hair, clad in black shirt and trousers, looming over him. 

"He'll come around, give him time" 

“What? Who are you?”

Erik smiled. “Why don't you take a look, Charles. You know me quite well.”

He enjoyed the myriad expressions that crossed Charles' face as he put his fingers to his temple and did as Erik invited him to do.

The brush of Charles' mind was more tentative than he was used to, as if Charles was still uncertain about his powers. Erik had never seen him like that.

Charles gasped. “You – you are – him – Erik.” 

“Yes, I am Erik – your Erik, from your future.”

“How? Why?”

“That isn't important now, what is – is that you are important to him, to me. He just doesn't fully understand that yet.”

Charles shook his head, still in disbelief of what Erik said about him being from his future, or doubt about what he said about how he felt for him.

Perhaps this was it. Here and now, in his own past, Erik could make a difference, give Charles hope, make him smile again. He leant closer, bracing his hands on the armrests of Charles' chair as he had done so often (ignoring the slight protest from his back). “You were always the more perceptive one of us, Charles. I'm a thick-headed fool, though at least I can promise that I will change, and in the end I will be only a fool for you – the only one worth to be a fool for. He – I, “ Erik looked pointedly in the direction of the door, “will realise that. All hope on me isn't lost, Charles. You know how focused I get, when I have set my mind to something.”

Slowly Charles nodded, and Erik noticed, pleased, how slowly his frown disappeared and was replaced with something like amazement. That was a look he appreciated on Charles' face a lot more (especially when they were in bed together). 

“Once I realise that it is you who is truly important to me – have always been – you won't be able to get rid of me anymore.”

There it was, the red lips trembled, then parted in the sweetest smile Erik had ever seen. Erik was intent on keeping that smile on Charles' lips and the spark of hope glinting in his eyes.

“From the moment you saved me from drowning, I was yours, even if it took me way too long to realise that.”

“Erik...” Charles put his hand against his cheek, the gesture familiar and yet strange coming from his Charles' younger self.

“What the hell is going on here? Charles, who is this!”

Quickly, almost guiltily, Charles dropped his hand and looked past Erik, who straightened much more slowly, before turning around to face – himself. It was less strange to come face to face with his younger self than he would have expected. Perhaps having seen Raven transform into him one several occasions had taken the novelty out of the experience, even though the hair was shorter than he wore it now, and of course wasn't white yet. His young self wore a silken magenta shirt and neatly pressed black slacks – trying to impress Charles. He remembered choosing carefully what to wear every time he paid Charles a visit. 

“I thought you'd left.” Charles' words were more bewildered and a little hopeful, but Erik knew his younger self would take offence and not hear the tone of Charles' voice.

“So you can get back to – whatever? Or rather whoever.” The jealousy and confusion radiating from Erik was tangible. Maybe that was a good sign, maybe that would finally get his younger self to think. 

Young Erik stepped forward, then stopped and leant down to pick up the leather jacket, that was lying discarded on a chair. “I just came back to get my jacket, I'll be right out of here again.”

From the corner of his eyes, Erik saw how Charles' expression crumbled at the words his younger self uttered so carelessly. 

Erik felt a rage he hadn't in years. Before the young Erik had had time to straighten and turn around, Erik stepped forward, using the momentum of the movement to deliver a punch to his younger self's jaw. 

He had expected to feel the pain himself, but it was only his hand that hurt, while he watched in satisfaction as his younger version staggered back in surprise, rubbing his jaw and touching his lip tentatively, checking for blood.

"Rethink your life, idiot" Erik ground out.

“Erik, no!”

Both of them looked at Charles, who leant forward in his chair, arm outstretched as if to reach out for Erik. His Erik.

But of course young Erik was too stubborn to see, to realise – instead he focused his irritation on the intruder. The metal in the room began to rattle ominously, then a heavy paperweight was flying at Erik. He didn't even need to spare it a glance to snatch it away from young Erik's grasp.

“My dear boy, you might have come far already, but I have come further.” With the flick of his hand, that was only for show, he reshaped the paperweight into a metal band he then wrapped around young Erik, tying his arms neatly to his body. Then he stepped closer without having to worry to get punched back.

Young Erik was looking confused and frustrated. “Who the hell are you!” He tried to get a grip on the metal, to wrest control back, but he lacked the advantage his older self had – of years of training, and Charles' help with that.

“Now listen carefully, Erik. I am you.” With one efficient movement Erik pulled back the sleeve from his left arm and held it so the number there, more faded now but still visible against his pale skin, was laid bare. It was the one thing he knew would make himself believe. 

Young Erik's shaking intake of breath was prove of that.

“I came here through some kind of portal, I didn't mean to, but here I am, and I will make the best of it. So you start to listen carefully, and not only to me, but to Charles. You – I – love him. Don't try to lie to yourself and finally accept it, or you will spend years wasting with denial of the most precious gift you have been given in this world, for Charles loves you back. Not just in the future, but right here, right now, and if you won't grasp that love with both hands and cherish it, you will regret not doing so for the rest of your life. Believe me! I'm not saying it will be easy, I'm not saying to give up what you believe in. But start to listen to what Charles has to say. You can compromise, and you will be surprised to find how much Charles is willing to compromise for you in return.” 

Erik realised that his younger self had given up trying to grasp for the metal around him. He was just looking at him, stunned. “How do I know he isn't controlling you now? “

At Charles indignant gasp, Erik quickly added. “Your future Charles.”

“Because my Charles IS your Charles. And when has he ever taken control of you?”

Erik was quick to answer sullenly. “He did once, when Raven shot me and she took off my helmet...”

Erik snorted. “I do remember, you know. I am old, not senile. But since you brought it up, this happened after I tried to shoot her, and after I did that embarrassing thing with the stadion, nearly crushing Charles under some scaffolding. I remember it very well, cause I was there, and I remember, he only took control to free himself, then he let me – you – go!”

Young Erik had the decency to look embarrassed like a scolded schoolboy.

“Now, will I have to tie you to a chair, or are you willing to stay and make an effort to listen to Charles and work this out together with him?”

Young Erik looked to the side, lips pressed into a stubborn line. 

Erik stepped closer still, so he could lean into himself and whisper into his ear. Gladly he knew himself, arguing further wouldn't do any good, and even though he didn't look like it, Erik knew he was ready to give in. He only needed one more little push in the right direction. “The only drawback in sharing a room and bed with Charles, is him being a morning person. Though he doesn't mind staying extra long in bed on Sundays, making sure I'm properly awake before we get up.” Young Erik's ears were turning an interesting shade of red, but it was an unmistakeable sign that he was listening. Now there was only one more important piece of information to deposit. “By the time we finally put aside our differences and got together, Charles had gone bald.”

Young Erik blinked surprised and looked over at Charles, who was watching them anxiously.

“It suits him, don't worry, still I would love to have the memory of what it's like to bury my hands in his hair, when I kiss him, or when we have sex.”

Now young Erik was looking torn between worry and embarrassment, but finally he cleared his throat. “I knocked over the chess pieces before, but maybe we could start a new game?” His gaze was on Charles, and as Erik turned to look too, he saw a shadow of that smile return to Charles' lips.

“I guess we can do that.” Charles licked his lips. “Start over...”

Young Erik nodded, and Erik finally released him, returning the metal to it's original shape of a paperweight. Though he did change the shape, so it looked like a heart. As a reminder for both young Erik and Charles, he told himself, not because he was a sentimental old fool.

“Alright, I will leave you to it then and try and get some rest myself. I'll take one of the spare bedrooms.” He didn't want to get in his own way and he was sure his young self would be reluctant to talk with himself present. And he was feeling a bit tired – and needed time to think. Obviously his Charles wasn't here, and the portal had vanished, so - how was he to get to his Charles? Even if he managed to make sure his and Charles' relationship was now off to an earlier and better start, was this the price he had to pay? To have lost Charles in the future.

No he wouldn't give up so easily. Once he was rested – and he and Charles had worked things out in the past, he would ask for their help to find a way and get back.

He would get back to his Charles!

♣ ♣ ♣

As he awoke, it was getting dark outside already. He had fallen asleep, though as he had laid down, his thoughts had been restlessly circling around Charles – and how to get back to his own time. Still he felt undeniably better for the nap.

Slowly he got up, went to the bathroom to wash his face, then headed back down to Charles' office. The door was standing half-open and as he looked inside he thought it to be empty. The chess set stood on the usual table, one chair in front of it, the other side left empty for Charles' wheelchair. It looked like they had stopped right in the middle of a game. Did that mean they had quarrelled again and young Erik had left after all? Erik sighed at his own stubbornness. But a small gasp from the couch let him look up and peek around the open door.

At the other end of the room, Erik was lying on the couch and he had pulled Charles out of the wheelchair on top of himself. His arms were locked tight around Charles, as if he was holding on for dear life and they were kissing frantically.

“Erik!” 

Hearing Charles moan his name, the one word so full of love and need, made him stop for a moment though. He smiled, wistfully. He was certain, however unreasonable his younger self was, he would not be able to leave now.

Slowly Erik eased back and pulled the door close.

Thoughts still on Charles and himself, he ambled down the empty corridor towards the kitchen, when he noticed an eerie light ahead. 

It was the portal that had brought him here, hanging in the air right where he had emerged from it before.

'How convenient.' Maybe he should examine the portal first, think about the likelihood of it dropping him off right where he had left. Yet what if it disappeared again? He wouldn't be able to see his Charles if he stayed and did nothing. Thinking only of how he needed to get back, he decidedly stepped forward and through the shimmering light.

 

♣ ♣ ♣

It was dark - then Erik realised he had his eyes closed and opened them. He was in bed, light coming from around the drawn curtains and he could hear birds singing outside. But something else caught his attention. He looked down at the bedsheets, and let his hand run over the magenta silk.

Erik had never been able to talk Charles around to having magenta bedsheets. Charles had said they reminded him too much of Erik's cape and seeing him leave on so many occasions. His heart burnt and his throat felt tight all of a sudden. 

He looked and found the place beside him in bed was empty.

Had his intentions for a better future together made things worse? Had his younger self not heeded his words, should he have stayed to make sure he and Charles were really alright now? _'Charles...'_

_'You are already awake? Perfect. If you could be a dear and open the door, I kind of have my hands full.'_

Erik's head jerked up at the beloved voice in his head and he threw out a hand, giving the metal doorknob a hard pull, that sent the door crashing against the wall as it swung open with unnecessary force. The doorknob hit the floor with a loud clonk.

Charles' amused smile greeting him was the best thing he had ever seen. “You must be more hungry than usual to loose control like that. I must have tired you out more than I thought last night.” There was a teasing twinkle in his eyes. 

His chair glided into the room, Charles balancing a tray laden with breakfast on the armrests of it and his own arms. He wore nothing but boxers and a pale blue shirt. 

Erik quickly took a hold of the tray and let it float over to a small table in a corner of their bedroom. He was hungry, for he felt like he hadn't eaten for a whole day, but more importantly he needed to reassure himself that he was back and Charles was here and everything was alright again – maybe better than alright.

Charles looked at him, probably catching up with his agitated thoughts. Instead of giving any more explanation Erik slid out of bed. He bent down and wrapped his arms around Charles, pulling him against himself, not even noticing his complaining back.

_'Erik?... oh... So it happened – today. Of course it would happen today, the day you brought us together.'_

And suddenly Erik remembered, all the years, of him and Charles together, from the day onward when he had forgotten his jacket and found Charles in conversation with – himself. How he had told himself to trust Charles, how they had played chess only to end up kissing on the couch like two frantic schoolboys in love, the quarrels that followed but how every time they worked hard to make up again, never giving up on each other. How Erik moved in with Charles only months later...

So many treasured memories.

And he remembered fondly, brushing his fingers through Charles' hair and smiled as he now ran his fingertips over Charles' bald head, just the way that made Charles sigh content with pleasure.

“Happy anniversary, my love.”

Erik moved his face closer to Charles', trying to blink back the tears from his eyes and whispered against Charles' lips before he kissed him. “Yes, happy anniversary to us.”


End file.
